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It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar. I saw Miss Hershey standing behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and Fifth Avenue when I whipped out my Whopper and whispered, “Hey Sweetheart, how’d you like to Crunch on my big hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?” Well, she immediately went [...]
A woman keeps asking her husband if her boobs are so small. ”Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?” she asks. The next day her husband buys her a mirror. Before bed, she always looks in the mirror and asks her husband, ”Does this shirt make them look [...]
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing. ”Doctor, the hormones you’ve been giving me have really helped, but I’m afraid that you’re giving me too much. I’ve [...]
Why does a man’s penis have a hole in it? So he can get oxygen to his brain.
Did you hear about the 80-pound guy with the 40-pound testicles? People say he was half-nuts!
What’s the difference between a blonde and a 747? Not everyone’s been in a 747!
I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 — that’s all the sailors I could screw in one night.”
1. I’ve smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahh, it’s cute. 3. Who circumcised you? 4. Why don’t we just cuddle? 5. You know they have surgery to fix that. 6. It’s more fun to look at. 7. Make it dance. 8. You know, there’s a tower in Italy like that. 9. Can I paint [...]